Is honesty really the best policy?
Is a little white lie okay sometimes?
Does anyone really, really, want to know someone's honest opinion?
These are some hard questions and I don't really know the answers. I do know, however, that if you ask a question, you should definitely prepare yourself for an honest answer. For example, if a woman asks her man,"Do I look fat in this?", he could possibly say "yes." Or another toughy is when you ask a man if he is seeing other women. You kinda gotta prepare yourself for his honest response. (I am speaking from experience here.) These are obvious times where you have to be careful what you ask for.
Now where it gets a little tricky is if your opinion was not solicited. Here are a coupla of situations. Ask yourself how you would really handle them.
1. You really can't stand your best friend's new man. You see him watching other women. He is kinda hitting on you. But she thinks that he is the best thing going. On one hand, she may appreciate your insight. On the other hand, she might think that you are jealous because you don't have a man.
2. Your co-worker wears clothes that are completely inappropiate to work. You can see that people stare, even the manager. But you think to yourself, is it really my business to comment on someone else's wardrobe? Or do I keep letting people talk about my co-worker?
3. Your friend's weave/hairstyle/haircut/hair color looks completely stupid/inappropriate/unproffesional. Do you tell him or her? You know some people are really sensitive about their hair. But at the same time, how much of a friend are you if you let them leave out the house looking a hot mess?
4. Last situation, you really like someone, you click on all levels. This person understands you, seems to genuinely care about you, but you have a slight issue with the person. Let's say that the person is slightly chubbier/skinnier/smellier/shorter/taller than you are usually attracted to. What do you do? Do you try to get over these issues because the personality overshadows? Or are you honest with yourself and the person in the very beginning? (And don't be all self-righteous like looks aren't kinda important.)
I dunno the answers to these questions. I do know that folks really don't wanna hear anything negative about themselves. But at the same time, if you care for someone are you obligated to tell the truth? Please feel free you comment.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
I think so. I think as long as you're coming from a place of respect & caring, and not being judgmental or petty, and telling the person in an appropriate place, honesty is alway best policy. I think if people weren't in their feelings so much, it would be easier to be honest.
To answer your questions:
1. Tell her. She might be mad at you now, but it sounds like this is a man who will end up hurting her in the long run. Even if she ignores you, she'll know you care.
2. If other people are looking/talking, tehn I would say something - discreetly, and after work. No one wants to hear that at 8 am and not be able to do anything about it.
3. So long as it's not just based on what you think is right/wrong, let them know. If I just don't like it, I'd just keep quiet, unless I was asked. If it was tacky - I'd immediately speak up, or unprofessional (like they're a teacher and have purple and pink hair), I'd let them know that it might not be cool for the workplace or whatever, and maybe give them the number of a good stylist.
4. This one, I'd be real with myself, physical attraction is important, but that in no way means I'd pass on the person. If it works, it works. If not, hopefully I've made a good friend
I know that was extra long, but you asked some good questions!
Post a Comment